My Team*

*Bearded homeless pushing shopping carts full of Dr. Pepper cans.

*Tanned yogis stretched out on grassy lawns pondering the infinite.

*Electronic wheelchair chariots carrying the weight of the sweat-panted obese barrelling down the sidewalk locked in an imaginary high speed chase.

*Motorcycle enthusiasts and their leather jackets with skull patches and allusions to hell and inferno and eternal damnation, chains hanging out of their pockets, bandannas of American flags adorning their bald heads.

*The insane who talk to themselves like talk show hosts with extreme hand gestures waiting for responses, devoid of cue cards or pretensions.

The chorus to this summer's feel good hit.

"When you're drunk and you're faded/Get some street tacos/Sweet tacos/Street tacos."

Okay, I will.

Cynergy...

...Brobot.

Let us pray.

Student loans, pay yourself please so that I might be able to be free of debt for simply wanting to learn about books.

Family, love thyself and thy neighbors and their neighbors and everyone who has or has had neighbors in their life.

Books, bless you and your words and your funny little quips that come about suddenly and make me smile to myself even when that isn't easy.

Bass guitar, why don't angels play you instead of harps? I see parades of risen ones stroking long necks of 1960s' SGs with endless stacks of Orange amps in tow: the gospel according to low end.

Train windows, I thank you for letting everything go by fast enough so that my eyes feel like they have to keep up with all that is happening. You are better than TV because you actually ask my senses to do some goddamn work.

Friends, what's wrong with you? Why do we all feel so low? Our lives are the product of beautiful dysfunction. Embrace it. Push it away. Leave those days behind. Establish yourself as a representative for the optimists' club.

Self, __________________________________________!

Amen, sister.

"Money has never been a reason to compromise.
You're very free if you don't love money." - Sarah Silverman

The neighbors' windchimes are a 2-in-1 meditation bell/wake-up call.

The Quotable Ava

"The moon!" She says pointing to the smiley face on her shirt.
"The moon is pizza."

There was no great flood.
Noah just liked a wide variety of bbq and needed an excuse.

Early Morning Animosity by Christopher Peselli

Lexi is a doosh.
Lexi smells like an armpit sandwich.

Miles is Satan.

Jamie is a hippie and smells like dirt.

Dave is a bacteria.

Max is a carnivore and likes to eat small dogs such as Miles (Satan).

Dave & Jamie are equally r**arded and both fall asleep early like Grandma.

Yes.

Mikey = (pile of shit)

Dave & Jamie = The View couch section but worse than Barbara Walters and Jay Behar.

Jamie likes to fog-up windows.

Mark = Towelee from South Park.

Lexi chews like a donkey and smells like a poopsicle x2.

Future Employment Opportunity

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wife_selling